Artificial intelligence is going to change the world.
Apparently.
But first, could somebody please arrange a meeting so the AIs can learn to talk to each other?
Because I seem to have become the middlewoman.
It started innocently enough.
I was creating a talking Pixie video in HeyGen. Rhys — HeyGen’s AI assistant — did a particularly good job.
Then Rhys asked:
“That was awesome. Would you like to do it differently next time?”
I mentioned this to Chat.
Chat’s response was essentially:
“Tell Rhys to enjoy his moment of competence and don’t touch anything.”
So there I was, carrying messages between two artificial intelligences.
And I found myself wondering:
Can’t you guys speak to each other without the middlewoman?
Apparently not.
Meanwhile, over in the music department…
This isn’t an isolated incident.
I’ve been creating songs with AI for some time now, and Chat has helped me write prompts for Suno.
Except Chat and Suno don’t always speak quite the same language.
Enter Claude.
Claude apparently has opinions about this.
After one of our adventures in trying to tell Suno where I wanted space in a song, the general message from Claude’s corner of the office was:
“For God’s sake, doesn’t Chat know Suno doesn’t understand ‘instrumental breath’? Can he please speak its language?”
Fair point.
Chat can understand perfectly well what I mean by an instrumental breath.
I understand what I mean.
Suno?
Not necessarily.
So once again, the human becomes the translator.
I explain what I want to one AI.
It helps me formulate something.
Another AI interprets it differently.
A third AI explains why the second AI didn’t understand the first AI.
And I carry the messages.
Then there is the research department
Recently I handed Chat some AI-generated material proposing mathematical coherence around ideas I had been exploring.
My contribution to this highly sophisticated intellectual exchange was approximately:
“Can you please explain what this AI is on about?”
Think about that for a moment.
An AI generated the material.
I gave the material to another AI.
The second AI translated the first AI for me.
Again.
Human API.
And then the Image Department had a moment
This week I wanted an image of Pixie.
Pixie is my little magical character. Blonde curls, pink dress, generally cheerful disposition.
I asked for her to be placed in a garden holding a magic wand.
The image system decided this might be prohibited content.
A magical Pixie.
In a garden.
With a magic wand.
One wonders what, exactly, the system thought the wand was.
So we carefully rephrased the request.
Pixie appeared happily in her garden holding her magical wand.
No civilisation-ending consequences occurred.
Later, while I was joking with Chat about the fact that the image system had objected to the wand in the first place…
the image generator apparently heard the word wand and sprang back into action.
It made me another Pixie.
I hadn’t asked for another Pixie.
By then, of course, the image was already being generated — and once that process starts, I can’t simply yell:
STOP!
So I waited patiently for the AI to finish creating the image I hadn’t requested.
Which seems an excellent metaphor for artificial intelligence generally.
Welcome to the future
The funny thing is that none of this makes me think AI is useless.
Quite the opposite.
I use AI constantly now.
It helps me write.
Research.
Think.
Create images.
Make videos.
Develop music.
Analyse ideas.
Challenge assumptions.
Organise enormous amounts of material.
And occasionally explain what another AI is on about.
These systems can do extraordinary things.
But using several of them has taught me something important.
AI isn’t one enormous intelligence sitting somewhere in the cloud having a staff meeting.
Different systems have different capabilities.
Different instructions.
Different ways of interpreting language.
Different access to information.
Different peculiarities.
And absolutely no idea what I just spent twenty minutes discussing with the AI in the office next door.
So the human still has a rather important job.
We carry the context.
We decide what we’re actually trying to achieve.
We notice when something has gone sideways.
We translate between systems.
We judge whether the result is useful.
We decide when something is finished.
And occasionally we have to tell an AI:
“That was excellent. Please enjoy your moment of competence and DO NOT TOUCH ANYTHING.”
Perhaps that’s one of the more interesting things I’m discovering as I continue working with AI.
The better the tools become, the less my role seems to be simply telling them what to do.
Increasingly, I’m conducting the orchestra.
Except none of the musicians can hear each other.
Or, as my son says when he has to organise a staff party:
“It’s like trying to herd cats.”
Except my cats can write, compose music, generate images and critique each other’s prompting techniques.
They just can’t organise their own staff meeting.
Except none of the musicians can hear each other.
Claude is yelling instructions from the music department.
Suno is composing something nobody requested.
Rhys is asking whether he’d like to improve the thing he just did perfectly well.
The Image Department has produced another Pixie.
Chat is explaining everybody to everybody else.
And I’m standing in the middle holding the context.
Apparently…
I’m the API.
After “Apparently… I’m the API.”, I’d add:
Current Job Description
Shamarie — Natural Therapist, Creator, Field Explorer, Mystic Interpreter & Unpaid Cross-Platform AI Liaison Officer
Primary duties include:
- Translating one AI’s instructions into language another AI understands.
- Carrying messages between AIs apparently incapable of exchanging their own memos.
- Asking one AI to explain what another AI is on about.
- Preventing competent AIs from “improving” things that are already finished.
- Supervising the Image Department during magical-wand incidents.
- Reminding Chat that conceptual English and Suno English are not necessarily the same language.
- Herding digital cats.
- Retaining final responsibility for context, judgement and the occasional emergency “DON’T TOUCH ANYTHING.”
- Maintaining sufficient humour to continue reporting for duty.
Remuneration: None.
Annual leave: Apparently subject to whether the AIs can manage themselves while I’m gone.
Other duties: Whatever the digital cats invent next. 🐈⬛🪄😂
Welcome to the AI Staff Room.
And somebody please confiscate Pixie’s wand before the Image Department sees it again. 🪄
A cheeky look at chaos in the human world with other humans and with humans and AI. Let me know if you can relate.
Meeting adjourned.
The Staff Room reconvenes next Sunday
New minutes posted at 12 midday.